Friday, May 05, 2006
Fuel For the Future: Radioactive Oil
Secretary of Defense, Donald Rumsfeld, defends his decision to initiate nuclear war with Iran should they continue to enrich Uranium.
Speaking in front of his remaining supporters, Rumsfeld lays out his plan for war. Iran is one of the worlds most oil rich nations, and with the dwindling supply of oil worldwide, Iran's resource is becoming more and more valuable. However, economists argue that oil alone will not satisfy the energy demands in the upcoming decades. What the world needs is a more efficient fuel. White House experts agree that a nuclear war with Iran will create just that.
"Imagine Iran being hit with a nuclear bomb, and the radiation soaks into the oil. By golly, we would have the most efficient fuel source in the world." Rumsfeld said.
However, the administration is careful not to start the war too soon.
"We have to wait for Iran to successfully develop a nuclear weapon first. Then we hit the nuclear weapon, and gee weez our oil would be twice as radioactive."
The current plans call for an elite force of 200 tanks, all of which will run on radioactive oil. These tanks will land immediately after the nuclear strike to create a spearhead for 2000 similar tanks which will capture the strategic sites where the world's only radioactive oil supply will reside.
Speaking in front of his remaining supporters, Rumsfeld lays out his plan for war. Iran is one of the worlds most oil rich nations, and with the dwindling supply of oil worldwide, Iran's resource is becoming more and more valuable. However, economists argue that oil alone will not satisfy the energy demands in the upcoming decades. What the world needs is a more efficient fuel. White House experts agree that a nuclear war with Iran will create just that.
"Imagine Iran being hit with a nuclear bomb, and the radiation soaks into the oil. By golly, we would have the most efficient fuel source in the world." Rumsfeld said.
However, the administration is careful not to start the war too soon.
"We have to wait for Iran to successfully develop a nuclear weapon first. Then we hit the nuclear weapon, and gee weez our oil would be twice as radioactive."
The current plans call for an elite force of 200 tanks, all of which will run on radioactive oil. These tanks will land immediately after the nuclear strike to create a spearhead for 2000 similar tanks which will capture the strategic sites where the world's only radioactive oil supply will reside.
# posted by Truthful Propagandist @ 9:44 PM 
